The Adventures of Cowboy Hazel

I got on the uptown 3 train at 96th Street this morning after my run without paying too much attention to what was going on.  It wasn’t until after the doors had closed and we began moving that I noticed that I was the only person on the car.  Not only that, but I couldn’t see anyone in any of the other cars either.  It was eerie.  And when it stopped at 110th Street, nobody was even on the platform.  It was just me all alone, the whole ride.  Maybe it’s an omen, I thought.  Then again, maybe I’m just looking too hard for omens, hoping that one will appear…

This conversation from earlier in the week was just too good not to share with you all. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did: (You have to see the linked photo to get the full meaning.)

J: hahaha. on the radio some guy just said that he wants to apologize to this person

Me: The Flight of the Conchords guy? Why?

J: he kinda looks like you in that photo. and yes, the blonde guy.

Me: You’re saying I look like Lisa Lampanelli? Fuck you.

J: i really have not done anything since i came in at 8:30. i’ve had this stack of work literally on my lap for the past half hour.

Me: Yeah, I need to start being a little more productive too. TTYL.

J: thick toes you love?

Me: Totally toxic yodeling llamas.

J: the thimble yelled loudly.

Me: Transvestites take yaks’ lives.

J: teachers touch young lesbians

Me: Telephones transmit yellow lies.

J: theologians take your liver.

J: hate to end the fun, but thought you might like this article. bible buddy

Me: That’s terrific, yelled Lampanelli.

J: you just took that to a whole ‘notha level.

Me: Thanks. I try. Seriously, though, I gotta get some work done. So, talk to you later.

I’m not sure when I’ll actually get to post this. I’m writing it mid-afternoon but can’t post it because my internet connection is down. Of course, if I was connected to the internet, I wouldn’t be writing this now because I’d be working so it wouldn’t be posted now either. So, I guess there was never any chance of me posting this post right now.

Yes, I know. That was corny. I apologize.

So, yeah, my internet is down and I’m not even that upset because my week was already so shitty that it had reached that point where you just have to laugh at anything else bad that comes in. The fact that so many different bad things could happen at once begins to seem comical. Typical, I thought, then just started laughing because I didn’t know what else to do.

Backup to yesterday morning: I thought I was finally getting over the sickness and so I met Sarah at five o’clock for a run on the west side. It was just six slowish miles and felt pretty good, but I was definitely tired and ready to get home and take a nap before work.

That nap never came. I turned on the computer to record my run and was greeted with a massive emergency — this big financial site that I’ve been working on for six months and finally launched last week had been completely brought down by this guy who was supposed to be doing a simple license fix. So, instead of a relaxing morning nap, I started the day frantically trying to get everything back online before the markets opened.

I was able to get everything there fixed by 8:30 or so, but then had to jump straight into my normal day of work. By the time that yesterday evening finally rolled around, I was completely exhausted. I could feel the fever coming back on and knew that I was in trouble. I took some cough syrup, plopped down on my recliner, and started watching Alphaville, an old black and white French movie about the future. (An interesting film, but horribly annoying soundtrack. Also, it gave me really weird dreams.) I dozed in and out of consciousness throughout the movie and then went straight to bed when it was done.

Thirteen hours later, my alarm went off and I was not at all ready to wake up. That’s how today started.

I worked throughout the morning and then, right after returning from a jog* down to NYRR to pick up my bib for this weekend’s half marathon, I found that my internet was down. A wasted hour on the phone with Time Warner trying to get it fixed and learning there was nothing I could do. Then, a trip to the grocery store. Still no internet. And, so, I write this now. And, I’m pretty much done writing so I guess I’ll just go take a nap or watch a movie. Shitty. I really should be working right now. I have so much to get done…

* I hate jogging. I don’t jog. I have Pearl Izumi ads taped to my refrigerator that mock joggers. Today, I jogged. It was horrible and pathetic and slow, but it was all I could muster. I am so sick of being sick.

– Long pause. –

I’m back online. I managed to get a couple more hours of work in, but then my brain just sort of shut down. My head is still all fuzzy and I need sleep. I’m headed to bed pretty soon, but first I wanted to reflect on how huge of an impact my internet going out had on my day… I mean, it completely brought me to a standstill. Luckily there wasn’t anything too urgent going on this afternoon, but what if there had been? I wasn’t even able to check my email. And, because my land phone is from Time Warner too, it was also out. That’s the number that all of my clients have — I’ve intentionally been trying to not give out my cell lately. So, I was completely unreachable for four hours in the middle of a Thursday. Scary. I think it might be time to get a Blackberry… As much as I hate the idea of being able to check my email from anywhere (mental picture: giant leash), it’s probably just something that I’m going to have to deal with considering my profession.

I’ve been contemplating what to do with the combo of cable/cell/phone/internet anyway. As it is, I pay like $220 a month. But, now that football season is over, I really have no need for t.v. anymore so I could cut out the cable. And I’ve seen unlimited cell plans for $99 a month. With that, I could ditch the land phone too. I think the internet alone is like $30 a month. That’s almost a hundred bucks a month that I could save. Something to think about…

Okay, I’m rambling now. Let me cut this off here and leave you all with one of my favorite old quotes: “I have made this letter longer than usual, only because I have not had the time to make it shorter.”

I am so, so, so happy that this week is over.  I am beyond the point of exhaustion and, frankly, don’t think I could keep going at this pace for much longer.  Work was completely overwhelming.  So many different issues (both good and bad) all managed to come in at the same time from pretty much every client on my list (and plus a couple potentially new ones).  Plus, I had to be at one of my client’s office most of the week so I had to commute to midtown (again, I don’t know how people can stand doing that every day).  Add in a couple dinners with friends and 40 miles of running and you get my lovely schedule from the past few days.  Leave the house at 4:55 to run, come back to shower, then leave again and don’t get back until 1:30 in the morning… Yikes.

Strangely, though, I’m not all that sleepy even though I’m so tired.  I think it’s that I’m still just amped up and thinking about all the crap that has to be done.  I’m writing this in the hope that it helps me relax a bit so I can get some solid rest tonight.  I’ve decided to sleep in before doing my short long run tomorrow morning (a ten miler).  I really felt in my legs today the lack of sleep and don’t want that to be an issue again tomorrow.

My neighbor (the cute one who lives next door, not the annoying one upstairs) knocked on my door a bit ago and invited me to go out with her and some friends but I was still working (on a lingering minor emergency from yesterday that had to be fixed today) and not sure how long it would be before I could finish so I said I couldn’t go.  Luckily, I got through the work issues quicker than I thought I would, but I think my neighbor already left… It’s probably for the best that I’m staying in tonight anyway though, since I’m desperately behind on filling my sleep quota. Still, it’s funny (ironic, not ha ha) that I’ve allowed myself to get so wrapped up in work, etc. that I end up spending my Friday nights here at home trying to recover from the week rather than being out on the town and actually enjoying my life…

Another piece of irony I’ve found is that the amount I run corresponds inversely with the amount of free time that I have.  It seems like the busier (and more stressed out) I get, the more miles I feel I have to run to keep from having a nervous breakdown.  In addition to the long run last Saturday, I ran 8.5 miles both Tuesday and Wednesday mornings.  Wednesday was probably the toughest training run I’ve ever done in my life.  It was very cold (18 degrees or something like that) and we did two 800 meter sprints, two 1-mile bursts, and a bunch of hill work in Central Park (keeping a very quick recovery pace in between instead of slowing to a jog).  I almost puked on the last hill I was so exhausted. I was forced to take yesterday off because I had to catch a couple hours of sleep and then I just did 4 miles at a 6:45 pace today so I’ll have fresh legs for the longish run tomorrow.

The extra miles this week felt really good.  My body is definitely handling them better than last year when I first started training for the marathon.  I think a lot of that is because I’m being smarter — I’m drinking my protein shakes religiously (even though I absolutely hate the taste of them), I’ve been stretching fairly well (well, better than I used to at least), and I have introduced more variety into my training runs instead of just doing constant speeds all the time. I think a lot of it is also that I’m just in better shape, now having almost a full year of running under my belt. The miles have actually felt so good that I’m toying the idea of running a spring marathon.  I’m going to wait until after next week’s Manhattan Half Marathon to make a final decision, but I’m seriously considering the Providence Rhode Races Marathon on May 3rd. I just miss the sense of purpose that I had while getting ready for Philly last year. Plus, I’m so anxious to go out there and erase all the bad memories of mile 22. I guess erase isn’t really the right word there — replace maybe?

Well, I still have an overflowing email inbox and Google Reader to tackle, plus I’d like to actually get away from this damn computer at some point, so I’ll call this quits here. Have a good weekend everyone!

A few followups, random thoughts, links, etc.:

~ I posted (a bunch of) photos from Christmas with the Family and the Road Trip to Ohio.  Check ‘em out if you’re bored.

~ I forgot to add “Run a Half-Marathon in under an hour and a half” to my goals for the year.

~ I’m pretty sure I mildly burned my legs today — My legs (both the joints and the muscles) have been aching real bad lately, so I drew a super hot bath with Epsom salts tonight. I may have made it just a little too hot. I forced myself to sit in there for twenty minutes and when I got out, my legs were bright pink. I had to shower off to cool back down. But my legs stayed pink.

~ I’m working on a list of lifelong goals too. It’s not laminated yet, though, so I won’t share it just now…

~ My favorite site/blog/I’m-not-sure-what-to-call-it had an exceptionally good post this week.

~ The people living directly upstairs are the loudest, most annoying people in the entire world. My apartment was so much better back in September before they moved in. Honestly, who the hell walks around their apartment in stilettos all night and listens to bad eighties music that loud? (I mean, besides my neighbor, of course.)

~ Tomorrow’s my first early morning run on the west side of the year. Yay! But, I’m a little worried about getting up at 4:30 because my schedule has been so much later lately… I’m nowhere near sleepy now and I’m already shy of the full eight hours even if I could somehow fall asleep right now.

~ Thanks for all the great comments lately. It’s been fun reading them.

Last night, as the clock struck twelve, I looked just like everyone else snapping photos and smiling and shouting “Happy New Year!,” but I wasn’t really all that happy. In fact, standing there watching the fireworks over Central Park, I suddenly got very sad that it was already 2009. It just seems like there’s so much that I should have accomplished by now that I haven’t and there were so many things that I thought I would do last year that I never got around to. True, there were many positives to take out of 2008, but they just don’t seem like enough.

Fortunately, other than that little moment, the last two weeks have been terrific. I played tourist here in NYC with my family for a week, then had a big, beautiful Christmas dinner here in at my place with them and my buddy who flew up from Miami. After my family left, we headed out west to Ohio. Our road trip was a blast even though the Jets game that started it off was, to say the least, disappointing. I won’t go into details of the two weeks because, if I did, I’d write enough to fill a novella and I don’t have the time or energy for that right now.

Instead, I’d like to finalize and share my goals for 2009. Maybe by having them down on paper (and seeing them checked off by December 31st), I’ll be able to consider this next year more of a success. Here goes:

• Run 1,500 total miles.
• Run at least 100 miles every month.
• Run a mile in under five minutes.
• Run a sub 3:10 marathon and qualify for Boston.
• Net $100,000 (before taxes).
• Completely pay off my credit cards.
• Get my Network of sites up to 1,000,000 visits a month.

A lot of those are carryovers of goals that were set and missed in ‘08. Let’s hope things go better this year. Aren’t odds supposed to be lucky?